Start Seeing Diversity

I think that society creates an environment of homophobia and heterosexism.  Gender stereotypes pay a large role in this specifically when many activities are defined as specifically for boys or girls.  If a boy or girl engages in a certain activity that is defined for the opposite gender, they can be described as a “tom boy” or a “sissy”. 

 

As I think about the books that I read with my children or the movies and television shows that they watch, I cannot identify a time when we have read about or watched a story that involved a gay family or couple.  It is almost like this topic is not allowed for young children.  Some of the books that I read with my children include a single parent, but never a situation with a homosexual couple.  Because children do not have much experience with this, it is something they are curious about when they see it. 

 

My daughter attended a daycare with two little girls who had lesbian parents.  One day, she told me that they did not have a daddy, but two mommies.  I began to explain to her that this is a typical situation.  In fact, she has two daddies, her step-father and her birth father.  She was not satisfied with this explanation and I told her that sometimes two women can love each other and sometimes two men can love each other.  She asked me several questions, but was most concerned about what the couples would wear when they got married!  She was very accepting of the fact that families can be different and I’m very glad she got to experience that at such a young age.   

 

I feel that early childhood centers should have books and pictures and other resources to help children develop an understanding of different families.  This is a great step toward creating a generation of open-mindedness.  In fact, because my daughter saw this, she was able to ask questions and feel open to the fact that all families are different.

 

If a parent expressed concerns about having a homosexual caregiver, I would discuss the concern with my colleagues and administrators.  I would hope that we could talk with the parent and offer some diversity trainings or workshops as well as invite the parents into the classroom to see how the child is being cared for.

           

I have not used a homophobic term toward a child as an insult, but have heard children use homophobic terms toward each other.  I work with a group of 5^th grade students.  Last year, there was a boy in another teacher’s class who liked a girl.  The girl did not return his affections and in retaliation, he spread rumors that she was a lesbian.  It was clear that this was meant as an insult and the teacher, administrator and parents had a conference with the child.  These types of comments could influence all children because it creates an environment where these types of comments, meant to insult, become acceptable for others to use.  It can also lead to children who may come from a family that has two moms or dads to feel embarrassed or to develop a negative self identity. 

 

Gender roles and stereotypes as well as homophobia are topics that need to be discussed and addressed with young children.  It is the lack of exposure and ignorance of the topics that lead children to create stereotypes.