Communication and Culture

As a child, I grew up in a very rural community which had little diversity.  It wasn't until I reached college that I was exposed to different cultures and a world of diversity I had never experienced.  As an adult, I wanted to live in an area where my children wouldn't be sheltered from the world around them.  I moved to a suburb a few minutes outside of Baltimore, Maryland, which is bursting with cultural diversity.

I tend to be a bit of an introvert and do not find communicating with anyone unfamiliar to be an easy task.  When I am communicating with people from different groups and cultures, I do sometimes get a sense of uneasiness.  I’m not sure if this comes from my feelings of feeling uncomfortable with conversing with others, whom I’m not completely comfortable with, in general or because the people are from a different group or culture.  I think I communicate differently by being more aware of what I am saying; I am hoping that I don’t say anything that might be offensive to someone unintentionally. 

To communicate more effectively, I could use Beebee, Beebee, and Redmond’s (2010) idea of self talk; thinking through what I am going to say before saying it.  I can also apply Bennett’s idea of the Platinum Rule; thinking about how others want to be treated (Beebee, Beebee, and Redmond, 2010).  Finally, I think I could spend time asking questions and trying to understand other cultures and groups in an effort to feel more comfortable communicating. 

I hope that my own children will not experience these feelings of uneasiness when communicating with others of different groups or cultures because they have been around so much diversity while growing up.

 References

Beebe, S. A., Beebe, S. J., & Redmond, M. V. (2011). Interpersonal communication:

 Relating to others (6th ed.). Boston, MA: Allyn & Bacon.

Verbal and Non-Verbal Communication

For this assignment, I watched ABC’s Revenge.  I had never watched the show before and actually had a difficult time understanding just what was going on, even after I had turned to volume on.  There were many characters in the episode, who I later found out, when I watched with volume, were all connected in some way or another.  When watching the episode on mute, I didn't

 realize the way that the characters were intertwined. 

            One specific example I watched was a man and a woman walking through the street.  They were holding hands and he gave her his jacket.  I automatically assumed by their behavior and non verbal communication that they were a couple.  After watching with volume, I found out that they were actually brother and sister.  Later, they walked into what looked like a campaign room up to an older man.  I assumed that the man was the girl’s father, but they did not express signs of contentment with each other.  They stood a distance apart and did not embrace.  This led me to believe that they may have had an argument.  This was not addressed in the episode, perhaps there was a conflict in a previous episode. 

             After watching this show without the volume, I realized that some parts of the plot were easy to decipher.  For example, there was a scene between a man and woman, who I assumed were husband and wife, where she behaved very coldly toward him.  She did not greet him when he entered the house and she sat down at the table and drank and ate as if he weren't there.  I could tell by the body language of the woman that she was not particularly fond of him.  When I turned the volume on, I was correct; in fact she had just helped another character spy on her husband. 

            Some parts of the plot were difficult to decipher, such as the relationship between the characters.  I didn't learn how they were connected until I watched the episode with volume and I started to learn their names. 

            I have learned that communication can occur in many different forms.  Also, a lot can be communicated without words, just by non verbal clues.  In the beginning of the scene, there was a blackout and some people showed concern on their faces by staring out the window with a furrowed brow or they looked tense and had a tight jaw when they were angry.  I also learned that non verbal clues do not always match up with what is actually happening.  For example, the couple who were holding hands wasn't a couple at all, they were brother and sister.  Communication is definitely not straight forward and it is important to pay attention to both verbal and non verbal communication to effectively understand a situation.  

What is Communication?

As much as I don’t like to admit it sometimes, my husband is a very competent communicator.  He is a very logical thinker and is also very organized and thorough with everything that he does.  He is the type of person that knows what he wants or expects and knows exactly how to get it.

 An example for this is when we were purchasing a car this past year.  Before even entering a dealership, he set criteria for what he expected from the car and spent time researching.  After using the criteria and research, he selected a few choices from various dealerships and emailed to gather information about their product.  When the dealerships made offers to my husband, he presented the offers to the other dealers who also had the same car in which we were interested.  This created competition among the dealers allowing us to get a better deal on the car we were purchasing.  Not only did he email the dealer, he copied all of the correspondences he made to the manager of the dealership as well.  This held the dealers accountable for customer satisfaction.  After he found the best deal for the car that we wanted, he transferred his communication from the dealer, who works on commission from the car, to the finance manager, who works on commission from the loan package.  This allowed us to receive the car at a lower rate than we would have working directly through the dealer.  All of this occurred before even setting foot into a dealership.  When we did finally go to pick the car up, we signed the documents and drove away with the care within the hour. 

Not only did my husband use his communication skills to save our family time, he also was able to leverage a good deal and get our car under the estimated value.  I believe that he knew how to communicate with the car dealers, but he also anticipated their motivations and used this to get what he wanted.      

I would love to model some of my own communication skills after my husband.  He is extremely assertive and confident in both what he says and what he does, especially when communicating in business type situations.  I am the opposite of him, I am much more laissez-faire in my behavior and try to avoid conflict and appease everyone.  I feel that being more direct could benefit me in achieving tasks both personally and professionally.