I think that society creates an
environment of homophobia and heterosexism.
Gender stereotypes pay a large role in this specifically when many
activities are defined as specifically for boys or girls. If a boy or girl engages in a certain
activity that is defined for the opposite gender, they can be described as a
“tom boy” or a “sissy”.
As I think about the books that I
read with my children or the movies and television shows that they watch, I
cannot identify a time when we have read about or watched a story that involved
a gay family or couple. It is almost
like this topic is not allowed for young children. Some of the books that I read with my
children include a single parent, but never a situation with a homosexual
couple. Because children do not have
much experience with this, it is something they are curious about when they see
it.
My daughter attended a daycare with
two little girls who had lesbian parents.
One day, she told me that they did not have a daddy, but two
mommies. I began to explain to her that
this is a typical situation. In fact,
she has two daddies, her step-father and her birth father. She was not satisfied with this explanation
and I told her that sometimes two women can love each other and sometimes two
men can love each other. She asked me
several questions, but was most concerned about what the couples would wear
when they got married! She was very
accepting of the fact that families can be different and I’m very glad she got
to experience that at such a young age.
I feel that early childhood centers
should have books and pictures and other resources to help children develop an
understanding of different families.
This is a great step toward creating a generation of open-mindedness. In fact, because my daughter saw this, she
was able to ask questions and feel open to the fact that all families are
different.
If a parent expressed concerns
about having a homosexual caregiver, I would discuss the concern with my
colleagues and administrators. I would
hope that we could talk with the parent and offer some diversity trainings or
workshops as well as invite the parents into the classroom to see how the child
is being cared for.
I have not used a homophobic term
toward a child as an insult, but have heard children use homophobic terms
toward each other. I work with a group
of 5th grade students. Last
year, there was a boy in another teacher’s class who liked a girl. The girl did not return his affections and in
retaliation, he spread rumors that she was a lesbian. It was clear that this was meant as an insult
and the teacher, administrator and parents had a conference with the
child. These types of comments could
influence all children because it creates an environment where these types of
comments, meant to insult, become acceptable for others to use. It can also lead to children who may come
from a family that has two moms or dads to feel embarrassed or to develop a
negative self identity.
Gender roles and stereotypes as
well as homophobia are topics that need to be discussed and addressed with
young children. It is the lack of
exposure and ignorance of the topics that lead children to create stereotypes.
